| Britney+Paris=Barack? |
| 2008-08-04 |
This last week was a real trip if you watched the news on tv. I learned that Obama is now as cool as Britney Spears and Paris Hilton. I knew he was the shit but I never thought he was that big. It was weird that a dude like McCain would be telling everyone how popular the guy he’s running against is. That’s like the Yankees taking out an ad saying how great the Red Sox are or Coors telling everyone how much better Miller tastes. I gotta think Obamas’ wondering what’s up with all the love? Just a couple weeks ago the white guys in blue suits and red ties were ripping him for being a rookie and now they think he’s about to pass Jesus on who’s most popular. He still has a ways to go on Allah and Buddha but he’s definitely hot right now. I guess people like Brad Pitt and Madonna are burned out on being really, really popular. They’ve had it with those papa something’s sticking camera’s in their faces at restaurants and airports. Now a few years back you know they would have killed to have somebody take their picture. They worked like hell to be bugged like this. It’s kinda funny huh? Don’t know if Obama’s burned out yet too but it sure seems to me that it’s way better to be popular than not popular. I’m now hearing all these republicans say that the couple hundred thousand Germans who come out on the street to say hi and listen to him rap about stuff was a bad thing. Real bad. What kind of politician dude draws that kind of crowd? That’s an easy question. None. At least not any republican ones. Can anyone think of a popular living republican? I know when they die they get sorta popular, about as much as say the Florida Marlins or that 5th or 6th rip off of CSI on CBS but when they’re still breathing which one of them could draw a crowd bigger than a cub scout pack? So even though McCain is saying all those nice things about Obama being a rock star you gotta figure it still pisses him off. When he goes to places to give sorta speeches most people in the crowd look like they’d rather be poked in the eyes with a pitch fork and those are his buddies. If he went somewhere that wasn’t full of people bused in from a nearby assisted living place it might look better on the tube. When you put a guy on a stage who looks whiter than Tony Robbins Teeth with a crowd (how big does a bunch of people have to be to be a crowd?) even whiter than him it gets pretty scary, like being snow blinded. They should rent some brown skinned guys or something if they have to. Maybe Obama could loan them some of his posse since he’s so damn popular these days. He could spare them cuz how popular does he need to be? How much is too much? If you ask assholes like Limbaugh and Hannity being liked by just about everyone but them is real bad. Worse than being a communist or something (are there any of those left?). I’m starting to think those guys want people that are not popular to really hate Obama for being what they aren’t. Since there are millions more of the not’s than the are’s then maybe they can mess him up. I mean McCain could be the first president elected for being not popular. How fucked up would that be? I mean pretty soon you could see all the crappy things in America become hot. Like the Seattle Mariners, stuffed crust pizza and Hummers (the car). I won’t lie to you that would probably be a really good thing for me. I mean how cool would it be for more than 4 people to actually dig my stuff? If all of a sudden bad was good my life would be a total blast but it would also mean the mummy man would be our next president and that’s not ok. I’m just hoping all the un popular voters out there don’t get too hacked off at Obama for being what they aren’t and do the right thing. I’ve got my fingers and toes crossed. In the meantime maybe he should just stay home at his crib, keep a low profile and all this popularity thing will go away. I read today that he’s going to do his big speech at the convention in the freaking Denver Bronco’s stadium so maybe not. We’re talking 78,00 humans. It’s not two hundred thousand Germans but it’ll still make the haters go crazy and flip out cuz their guy couldn’t fill up a mobile home. I can’t wait until this election is over and I can go back to worrying about things like my prostate and getting evicted. Later. |
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