| McCain's Side Kick |
| 2008-09-02 |
Have you ever had a buddy bring a new friend around and the first thing that hits you is a big fat why? Not that the new friend is a total loser or anything but you just can’t figure it out. What’s he see in this person? Why not just about anyone else but this clown? That’s what I was thinking when I saw the lady McCain picked to ride shotgun with him. Though I really dug her Fargo accent and the sexy librarian look it still seemed like an episode of Punk’d. And maybe it is. It’s still possible some republican dude in a blue suit and red tie will come on FOX NEWS any time now and say it was all a big joke and that the real choice is just about anybody but this lady. If it doesn’t happen and she stays one choking chunk of meat away from being the head cheese of the world then I’m thinking seriously of being born again. Just to be safe. It never hurts to be prepared for the worse. I mean I’m not a church guy but the religious angle is the only way to make sense of it all. I always thought the anti-christ thing was a scam but now it’s at least possible she could be the one. Think about it. She comes out of nowhere and if things fall her way she’s more popular than both the Beatles and Jesus combined. The down side if she is the anti-christ though is all us democrats are going to burn in hell for like forever and that doesn’t sound like much fun so I’m hoping instead she’s just a another right wing ding bat. There’s a decent chance of that too cuz she’s against stuff like evolution, that global warming thing, gun control and sex education in schools. I’m thinking her 17 year old daughter maybe sorta pregnant right now but if she had to hear that sex junk in class she might be having triplets or something. So if you’re keeping score at home this lady is for shooting polar bears and wolves from helicopters, home schools, drilling for oil anywhere-anyplace, AK 47’s, and low taxes on oil companies so it’s not tough to see why this could be anti-christ is so flipping popular with the conservatives. Now I’m still not totally sure what a real conservative is but I’m thinking she has to be one of them. Why else would Limbaugh get a woody without pills just talking about her on his show? And Hannity had to take a bathroom break in the middle of his show last night when they put her picture up on the screen. I even heard that Mikey Medved radio guy had a wet dream the night after she got picked so you know she’s got them where she wants them. If it turns out that she’s not the anti-christ and is just a hot babe who lucked into this gig then I’ll be really pissed off cuz she’s not that smokin! Why not a total mega babe then? If they’re going to milk this then go all the freaking way and pick Angelina Jolie or even an oldie but goodie, Barbie Benton! They have about as much experience as this lady does. I know the republicans have their script where they say she has more of it then Obama but if you look close you can see they usually have their fingers crossed or something when they say it. They know that if McCain does win then a really cute Barney Fife will be sitting there with more than one bullet to fire if anything happens to him. The last I heard we had a butt load of those nuclear missiles so everyone best think about this before it’s too late. What good will it be for republicans if they win and the world blows up cuz of some screw up from their Alaskan Annie Oakley? They might have their tax cuts, no abortions and guns for everyone but what good will it be for them? Being either dead or embarrassed the rest of the earth is laughing at us 24/7 ain’t good so what I’m suggesting to republicans here is if she isn’t the anti-christ then please think about a do over. Sure people will give McCain a lot of crap at first but later they’ll let up and pat him on the back for doing the smart thing. I mean a long time ago he was a pretty cool guy with his straight talk mini van, maybe he has a little coolness still left in him to fix this thing. Stranger things have happened and it’s his move now. We’ll see what happens. Later. |
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